Blame: Why Do Some People Always Blame Others?

For change to take place and progress to be made, there needs to an element of responsibility. And this applies to all areas of one's life; without it, something might stay as it is or simply get a lot worse.

But while this is evident, it doesn't mean that someone will take responsibility for what happens to them. There are people who may take responsibility for some things and not others. And then there will be people who renounce all responsibility.

When something first happens it might be normal to feel that someone is to blame and as time passes, one can bring their focus back to themselves. And then start to look at what they can do to deal with what has happened or how to move on from what has happened.

Moving On

If one is in a place of blame, they might soon forget about it and move on with their life. But, they could also hold onto this blame and this can depend on how much of an impact the experience has had on their life. It could be something that has caused so much pain that one holds onto it for many, many years and even their whole life.

There are often certain situations where blame appears the most and this is typically related how much control one feels they had over what took place and how much control they have after it has taken place.

Common Examples

There is no doubting that blame that can occur around anything and everything. And yet there are some common experiences where blame arises. Some people blame their parents for what they are like and how there life has turned out. Other people blame their partners for not being allowed to do what they want and for losing their freedom for instance.

One could blame their ex partners for causing them so much pain and suffering. Another example is when someone blames the society that they are in for what they have or don't have in life. It is also possible for one to blame the education system for not giving them the grades or career that they wanted. The health care system or ones doctor could also be blamed for how unhealthy one is.

Under The Blame

So while in some cases blame can be appropriate and beneficial, it is often a cover up for something deeper. To blame someone or something can cause a release and settle one's mind for a short time. But under the blame can be a feeling of having no control and of being powerless.

For one to face this head on can be too painful and pointing the finger at an external source can stop one from having to face how they truly feel about what has happened. However, all the time these feelings are there, the need to blame someone else will continue.

Regulation

So what blame allows one to do is to regulate how they are feeling. These feelings of being powerless are not going away though and this pain will only be dealt with momentarily. One could end up being trapped in a blame cycle and be unable to get out of it.

It is normal for the mind to seek pleasure and to avoid pain and this means one might not even be aware of why they are in a place of blame. To them, blame could be the only option available.

Role Models

And while there is the factor of one wanting to avoid how they a really feeling in regards to what has happened, there are also others factors in causing one to blame others and to not take responsibility. One of those factors in the kind of role models they have had throughout their life.

On factor is that the more powerless people become at a local level and at a global level, the more common blame will become. The other factor is that the more blame there is in the world, the more people will mimic this behaviour and see it as normal. So there are at least two causes at work here. And each one will perpetuate the other.

There are plenty of people who don't take responsibility in the public eye and one can also have friends, family and colleagues who are the same. Their early upbringing could have included family members who blamed everyone else for their challenges and didn't own them. And this could have been the result of them also feeling powerless.

Self Fulfilling Prophecy

If one does feel powerless and that they have no control, they could unconsciously attract situations into their life where they are taken advantage off. So without knowing it, they are creating a self fulfilling prophecy. This could relate to painful experiences that were not processed in their adult life and due to what happened to them as a child; when they felt powerless to do anything.

This then becomes a form of indirect revenge; with one repeating the same patterns over and over again. These situations give one the opportunity to express their repressed anger that occurred through feeling hopeless. And until one deals with the emotional pain that exists on the inside, they will continue to attract people and situations that cause them to see blame as being justified.

Awareness

There are clearly many different sides to blame and different approaches that one can take here. If one feels that taking responsibility for what is taking place would be too overwhelming and that blame is the only way they can cope, then it might be necessary to seek some kind of assistance.

This could be a therapist that allows one to release their trapped feelings and emotions. As one starts to let go off their feelings of being powerless and hopeless and therefore understanding their personal power, the need to blame others will start to diminish.

Author: Oliver J R Cooper

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Life Coaching by Lorene Cowan Announces Special Outreach Initiatives for National Wellness Week

                Including First International Expansion for the Rapidly Growing Company

NEW YORK – September 16, 2013 – Life Coaching by Lorene Cowan, one of the leading life coaching firms in the nation, announced today a special program to help bring affordable career, life and wellness coaching services to those in need in the community as part of National Wellness Week taking place September 16 through 22.

“There are many people in our community that are still affected by the economic crisis and need some assistance with one-on-one career and life preparation coaching,” Cowan said. “That’s why we are offering some very special outreach efforts during this important time.”

For all first time clients, Cowan will be donating one hour of coaching for free with the purchase of one hour during National Wellness Week valid for up to one year not to be used with any other promotions. She is also offering discounted rates for businesses and organizations that would like to have her speak on various wellness topics.

 “I really want to get out in the community and enable others to succeed in the future,” Cowan said. “The power of having a life and career coach is amazing and it is a passion I would love to share with others.”

She is available to provide her service to clients nationwide via phone, Skype and even announced today her first efforts to take her successful program worldwide.

Last year, National Wellness Week events took place in 36 states and Puerto Rico. According to the United States Department of Health and Human Services, the initiative sought to focus on the intellectual dimension by harnessing the power of creative expression and encouraged individuals and communities to make time for a creative activity to promote wellness.

“I hope my effort will help people feel more empowered to change their lives,” Cowan said. “We all have the power inside of us to really make this an amazing world.”

For more information about Lorene Cowan, or to book coaching time with her during National Wellness Week, please call 925-LOR-ENE1, email info@lifecoachingbylc.com or visit her website at www.lifecoachingbylc.com.

About Lorene Cowan

Lorene is a graduate from St John’s University with a Bachelor of Science in Communications. She has had the opportunity over the years to work and speak to some of the most dynamic groups of entrepreneurs from all over the country. Lorene has worked on various projects in real estate, entertainment, television, fashion, wellness and the beauty industry. With her entrepreneurial and wellness back ground she has helped guide individuals through specific and or overall aspects of their lives - from creating marketing strategies for their company’s growth to working through personal life issues as well as managing wellness they maybe neglecting because of their busy life style.

Not only does she work with entrepreneurs, but she also works with everyone from the stay-at-home mom to the career climbers, seekers, and those in between. Lorene finds herself lucky to be touched by, and have the ability to work with, the lives of so many unique individuals and groups. The desire to help others take their business and lives to the next level gave birth to Life Coaching by Lorene Cowan, a Lifestyle Management Company. Lorene also brings her unique combination of personality traits (creative, balanced, etc.) along. Whatever your background - Lorene is looking forward to help you nurture and take your life to the next level.

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Author: Lorene Cowan

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Self Development Practices for Body Mind Healing

 Add Passion to Your Life

One of the most common questions that you should ask yourself is – "what is the purpose in my life?" Knowing your purpose helps you set meaningful goals. And you need to check whether your goals are actually 'yours'. Sometimes, you set the goals in your life, which have been influenced by your parents, friends, media or society. Your goal may be to become rich, famous or beautiful. However, you need to ensure whether these are actually your goals and whether they really make you happy. Finding your inner goal often requires self development practices. Realizing your passion for living can help you find out where to put your time and energy.  By adding passion to your life, you can improve your life.

Some Simple Tips to Develop a Passion for Living

Whether you experience physical pain like back pain and neck pain or emotional reactions like anxiety, fear and depression, you can get rid of them only if you target the root of that physical or emotional pain. Otherwise your body mind healing will be incomplete. Discovering the root of your pain requires a willingness to take an in-depth look at what is happening.  It is important to accept your power to deal with emotional reactions.  Self awareness practices are the keys to get relief from your physical and emotional pain and to unlock your potential to achieve passion for living.

Self awareness helps you understand what can make you feel happy, what stops you from moving forward and what you want to achieve in your life. Self awareness helps you get an understanding of various facets of yourself, including the way you think, your emotional reactions to situations and your inner guidance. Strengthening your self-awareness can help you do things that you love and enjoy most, find out your inner strengths and identify the area that allows your passions to guide you on your life journey.

Self awareness practices involve getting a clear understanding of what you like and dislike and what motivates you. In order to lead a happy life, you need to be able to motivate yourself. Your core values are the building blocks that help you live your life. They play an integral part in deciding the way you live. You may live according to the unwritten rules handed over by your parents, grandparents or religious beliefs.  These rules inform you how to lead your life and what is important to you. Understanding your core values is the most important step in getting self awareness and creating an environment that better suits your needs. It also helps you discover your true potential and achieve body mind healing. 

Author: John Robson

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Ten good habits of passionate people!

1. Passionate people are doers. Passion is the genesis of genius. They like to talk about things that excite them, and prefer to fulfill their promises with actions. Fire your passion, get in full swing, and devote everything to realize your dream.

3. Passionate people are courageous. Chase your passion, not your pension. They are willing to do anything to finish their work. They determine to conquer difficulties and wipe out any stumbling blocks on their way to what they desire.2. Passionate people are emotional. Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you. They are looking forward to great things every day. Their enthusiasm can infect people around them. It's hard not to be pulled in by their passion, even though you thought what they say interest you not.

4. Passionate people are positive. Nothing great in the world has ever been accomplished without passion. They won't make friends with passive people. They value positive thought on themselves and others, and won't lose any time to failure. They remain optimistic and find a way when they are frustrated. They will take it more as a setback than a failure on their dream-seeking trip.

5. Passionate people are dedicated. Passion rebuilds the world for the youth. It makes all things alive and significant. They want to show the world how excellent they are. To a certain extent, they are perfectionist in thinking. This is why achievement means ego in their mind. Where can be stamped must be their essences.

6. Passionate people are motivating. Man is only great when he acts from passion. Need help for getting a new project started? Turn to passionate people who are adept in leading and encouraging others. They really care about others and get things done painstakingly.

7. Passionate people are happy. Live with passion! Those living for their dreams feel content easily. What they focus on is not only their happiness, but also infecting others with happiness. If life throws them lemon, they will brew a cup of lemon tea cheerfully.

8. Passionate people are responsible. If passion drives you, let reason hold the reins. A good advice I heard is passion is a potent and double driving force: it may break out huge loss if we banish it, while this same emotion can be turned into an engine of positive energy if we use it properly. They know how to control emotion and bring their energy into play.

9. Passionate people are focused. Skill is the unified force of experience, intellect, and passion in their operation. They are clear about what their mission is and put their heart and soul into it. They can run in heavy rain, and smile to a humble job. They stay focused on their goals no matter how distracted their life is. They believe their hard-working more than taking shortcuts. Their inner passion will guide them to their final goal.

10. Passionate people keep growing. Develop a passion for learning. If you do, you will never cease to grow. They are trying every way to get themselves and their situation improved. To life, they feel as curious as the children, and they keep learning, growing, and trying something new.

Author: Sophia Gong

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Time Management: Work Your Plan

Absolutely nothing takes place until it is arranged. Mass transit, TV programs, the movies, distribution services, company conferences, cash advances, bill payments, and college lessons all work on a timetable.

Effective small business owners plan their work and work their plan. Does your business have a strategy? Does your business have an effective blueprint for you to comply with? If you have a company system are you following it?

It is incredible how individuals appear to work day-to-day, punch that time clock, hang around for their breaks, lunch times, then punch out to go home. When it is time to function their plan they fall short, they function their company's strategy and. They are too worn out, it's also difficult, the business does not help them. These people should simply quit their business.

I see annoyed brokers in my workplace who do not have a strategy. They can not make sales or obtain leads. They fall short to adhere to a tested procedure that is offered by the brokerage firm.

Honest truth and Clarity

Having a strategy delivers clarity. You beat irritation, postponement, uncertainty, and fear when you work your plan. Recognize that building your home company takes job.

Understand that the work, learning curves, reduction of cash, and bad marketing are a part of the business. You can't avoid these obstacles. They will certainly show up and if you work your plan you will certainly surpass them.

Below are 5.5 ways to Work Your Plan:

1. Your Business Outcome - What are your home based business objectives? The amount of money do you wish to make each month? Why are you in company? How long do you thinking of being in this company? Obtain you clear on your outcome. Do not start off the trip up until you know your location.

2. Follow a Successful Plan - There are success systems for you to adhere to. Realty brokers, insurance policy representatives, and other independent specialists must have a franchise business strategy to comply with. Right here is an idea ... function their plan. Make their strategy your plan. Their plan is your shot at excellence if you are a beginner or do not have any sort of experience.

You can create your own strategy however pick up from experimentation. We do not deal with lack of info. You could find effective systems that provide the training, advertising, and sales you need.

3. Make a Schedule - You have the plan...now make a timetable. For my team I tell them to schedule 3 hours each day. Produce material for 1 hour, market for 1 hour, and educate on your own for 1 hr. If you have additional time adjust correctly.. These are income producing activities.

Use this method. Work for 25 mins after that take a 5 min break. Work for another 25 minutes and take a 5 minute break. I prefer to work for 50 mins and take a 10 min break.

5. Using Your Time - As your business increases you will have the funds to outsource those mundane tasks you despise to do. You could utilize systems and people to help your business increase without anymore additional effort from you. You could contract out to individuals that could do it better compared to you and you make the earnings!

There are successful company models that have these using systems in position. Make sure the firm has a track document for excellence.

5.5 Treat Yourself - When you work your plan make sure to schedule some household fun time, and getaways. All job and no play makes you a bore. Put these activities in your plan. Happiness is an existing point and you should enjoy the fruits of your labor. Treat yourself my good friend.

Because they intend their work and work their plan, successful people run successful home companies. There succeed systems out their for you to make use of. They still require an initiative and will certainly assist you obtain to your targets a lot faster. Or produce your very own system yet be certain to profit from hit and miss. Work your plan and be an excellence.

Author: Charles Fitzgerald Butler

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Knocking out Procastination

I know what to do. I recognize the benefits of doing it. I understand the negative consequences of not doing it. I have the competence and resources to do it. But I still don't do it.'

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Does this story sound very familiar?

I am sure you will agree with me that we all encounter postponements that keep us from doing what is critical for our success. We cannot always control what happens to us but we can always exercise control over how it will impact us. We do not have to let delays defeat us. We don't have to give into these energy suckers and become a victim of procrastination. Why should we leave ourselves at the mercy of ‘The Guilt of the Incomplete'? But first  the question arises,  why do we do that?

WHY DO WE Procrastinate
Before we discover a treatment for this universal disease, ‘procrastination', let us look at some of the reasons behind it.

1.Waiting for the right mood
You don't feel like doing it. Your mood is o_ and you are emotionally down.

2. Waiting for the right time
You don't think that it is the right time to take action, when actually it is.

3. Lack of clear goals
How can you feel inclined to do it when the goal is not clear?

4. Underestimating the difficulty of the task
You thought doing it was no big deal, but when you started you realized that you would have to put in much more effort than you first thought. So why not postpone it for now?

5. Unclear standards for the task outcomes
You started but did not have an idea about exactly what was expected. You did not know the performance criteria.

6. Feeling the task is imposed on you
When you think you have to do it, your motivation is reduced. Your heart and mind are not fully involved.

7. The task is too ambiguous
You finally got around to doing it but the task was too vague, unclear and blurred. Then you did not find good reason to continue.

8. Fear
‘I don't think I can do it; if I go ahead I will not succeed.'

10 Perfectionism
‘I don't have the right skills or resources to do this perfectly, so I won't do it at all.'

FROM INACTION TO ACTION
After acquiring all the tools, techniques and strategies, why do people not put into use what they know? Why do people choose inaction instead of taking action? We have identified some psychological fears. These fears suppress your inventiveness; your talents and resources remain hidden, undeveloped and untapped. These fears include:

1 Fear of failure
If I were unsuccessful, how would I handle the embarrassment? It's better not to show up for this presentation. Let's procrastinate.

2 Fear of success
If I do it this time, people will expect me to do it again. Will I be able to
handle the pressure that comes with success?

3 Fear of the status quo
If the status quo is disturbed, who knows how the new situation will
turn out? Let's maintain things as they are. Why take a risk?

4 Fear of perfection
If I started it now, I would not complete it until I achieved a level of perfection. Do I have time for perfection?

5 Fear of loss
If I did it now, I might end up losing out on a few things. Can I

RECOGNIZE THAT YOU'RE PROCRASTINATING
How would you recognize in yourself the symptoms of procrastination?

I am listing some of them:
• Filling your day with low priority tasks from your To Do list
• Reading an e-mail more than once, without starting work on it
• Starting work on a high-priority task, and almost immediately going off to make yourself a cup of coffee or check your e-mails
• Leaving an item on your To Do list undone for a long time, even though you know it's important
• Regularly saying ‘Yes' and filling up your time with unimportant tasks

Why you procrastinate can depend on both you and the task. They can often be reduced to two main reasons:

1. You find the task unpleasant; or
2. You find the task overwhelming

Now that you know the symptoms and reasons for procrastinating, the question is how do you crush procrastination? How do you knock it out?

ANTI-PROCASTINATION-FORMULA
This attitude or syndrome has the potential to negatively impact your results, success and even your entire life. I have created a strategy to defeat procrastination and build results faster. I call it the IMAN TECHNIQUE.
I
Must
Act
NOW
 So,
Are you ready to act now? :)

Author: Qaiser Abbas    

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Our Attitude Toward Life Determines Life's Attitude Towards Us!

There's a well-known quote that goes "Our attitude toward life determines life's attitude
towards us." Attitudes do make a difference. Salesmen using the ideal attitude beat their sales quotas; students using the proper attitudes make A's. Suitable attitudes pave the way to a truly happy married life

Correct attitudes make you powerful in coping with other people to ensure that it is possible to be effective as a leader. Among the very first qualities men and women notice when they meet you is what you attitude is towards whatever you're responsible for. If your attitudes are negative, then you might want to undergo an "attitude tune-up".

Fully grasp the importance of attitude.
Your attitude impacts every little thing you do, feel and say. If you wish to turn your attitude about and get into action towards your destiny, you might want to have the ability to resist negative or pessimistic thoughts that creep into your consciousness. surround your self with positive men and women, and maintain in mind your ultimate objective of achieving the, respect, good results and wealth which you deserve.

Opt to remain positive.
Power to choose is God given. You are going to encounter some hurdles and encounter some failures in life; but is really crucial that you simply manage how you respond to whatever takes place, and maintain your positive attitude , whilst working towards your objectives. The bible says "I have set before of you blessings and curses, life and death. So choose life" What will likely be your choice? Program" your attitude by training your self to remain upbeat. Identify negative attitudes that continually set you back. 

Assess your present day attitude and identify aspects of which could be stopping you from becoming prosperous. What are the underlying causes of one's negative attitudes? Remind your self that you simply are far better than you believe. Take a walk if you are frustrated. Just look at life as you walk until the disappointment is out of your system.

Determine to live your life with purpose and passion.
Reassess exactly where you wish your life to go and all which you would like to accomplish. Get a clear vision, to ensure that you've got some thing to reach for. When you have got your objectives firmly established, then you'll be able to turn your new positive attitudes into action.

Create a method for sustaining the proper attitude. Prepare your self to deal with any difficult scenarios that may well threaten your attitudes and throw you off course. You ought to create some self-motivation tactics like affirmations, visualization, positive talk, enthusiasm and heightened expectations Read books and articles on these subjects and build understanding and abilities to boost your attitude. 

Follow the five steps outlined above, and create attitudes which will transform your life and assure that you get the success you deserve.

Author: David H Evans

Brought to you by Life Coaching by LC

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Questions For Success: Do You Respect Who You Are?

Saul Alinsky is widely considered to be one of the greatest community developers in North America. His seminars regularly encouraged people to find success in life and follow their dreams. One of the questions he would pose to his audience was, "Do you like and respect who you are?" This is a query that bears examining.

Liking And Respecting Yourself Is One Of The First Steps To Finding Success In Life

You need to ask yourself deep questions about how you feel about yourself:

• What do you like about yourself?
• What do you think you do really well?

As an exercise, write down everything you like and respect about yourself on a sheet of paper. Make sure you also include all of your talents, likable qualities, things you're good at, skills, and anything else positive you can think of. Not only will this help you keep track of everything, but you can refer to this list for a mood boost in times of need.

The Next Step Is To Think Of Something You Don't Like About Yourself

This may seem like a surprising step, but, it is vital to knowing yourself and accepting who you are. Ask yourself:

• What is the one thing you would change about yourself, were you given the chance?

This could be personal, like a tendency to procrastinate, or it could be interpersonal, like a tendency to look down on others. Maybe you spend more money than you bring in, or you ignore everything in your life in favour of work, or you have an easily-excitable temper.

Once you think of this unwanted aspect, write it down. Then make a promise to yourself that, over the next twelve months, you will take steps to better yourself in that area. This could entail putting a limit on your spending, watching your behaviour more closely, or even apologizing to people you may have wronged in the past. Occasionally, you can refer to the list to remind yourself of your goal and how to achieve it.

One of the main ways we can come to respect ourselves is through bettering ourselves, and this is what writing down your good and bad qualities will help you do. At a glance, you will be able to see the areas you are strongest in and the areas in which you could improve. The key to self-respect—and by extension, personal success—is to focus on empowering yourself through your strengths and reducing or eliminating your weaknesses. But, always remember to accept and respect who you are now and who you are about to become.

Author: Delva Rebin

Brought to you by Life Coaching by LC

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Our Attitude Toward Life Determines Life's Attitude Towards Us!

There's a well-known quote that goes "Our attitude toward life determines life's attitude
towards us." Attitudes do make a difference. Salesmen using the ideal attitude beat their sales quotas; students using the proper attitudes make A's. Suitable attitudes pave the way to a truly happy married life.

Correct attitudes make you powerful in coping with other people to ensure that it is possible to be effective as a leader. Among the very first qualities men and women notice when they meet you is what you attitude is towards whatever you're responsible for. If your attitudes are negative, then you might want to undergo an "attitude tune-up".

Fully grasp the importance of attitude.
Your attitude impacts every little thing you do, feel and say. If you wish to turn your attitude about and get into action towards your destiny, you might want to have the ability to resist negative or pessimistic thoughts that creep into your consciousness. surround your self with positive men and women, and maintain in mind your ultimate objective of achieving the, respect, good results and wealth which you deserve.

Opt to remain positive.
Power to choose is God given. You are going to encounter some hurdles and encounter some failures in life; but is really crucial that you simply manage how you respond to whatever takes place, and maintain your positive attitude , whilst working towards your objectives. The bible says "I have set before of you blessings and curses, life and death. So choose life" What will likely be your choice? Program" your attitude by training your self to remain upbeat. Identify negative attitudes that continually set you back.

Assess your present day attitude and identify aspects of which could be stopping you from becoming prosperous. What are the underlying causes of one's negative attitudes? Remind your self that you simply are far better than you believe. Take a walk if you are frustrated. Just look at life as you walk until the disappointment is out of your system.

Determine to live your life with purpose and passion.
Reassess exactly where you wish your life to go and all which you would like to accomplish. Get a clear vision, to ensure that you've got some thing to reach for. When you have got your objectives firmly established, then you'll be able to turn your new positive attitudes into action.

Create a method for sustaining the proper attitude. Prepare your self to deal with any difficult scenarios that may well threaten your attitudes and throw you off course. You ought to create some self-motivation tactics like affirmations, visualization, positive talk, enthusiasm and heightened expectations Read books and articles on these subjects and build understanding and abilities to boost your attitude. 

Follow the five steps outlined above, and create attitudes which will transform your life and assure that you get the success you deserve.

Author: David H Evans

Brought to you by Life Coaching by LC

info@lifecoachingbylc.com

www.lifecoachingbylc.com

How We Project Our Feelings Onto Others

Have you ever become so upset with someone like your partner or a parent and then later sat down and wondered if you were justified in your anger? We often project our feelings onto others without our conscious awareness. Did something they say make you feel particularly angry or frustrated? You might be surprised to find out that many times when you react negatively toward another person, you might not really be angry with them at all. In fact, you might actually be completely upset with yourself and you don't even realise it!

This little phenomenon is called projection and it occurs when one person unconsciously transfers his or her own feelings onto another person. You project your feelings onto them instead of owning them yourself.

For example, if a woman happens to have an insecurity about her looks and she sees her boyfriend innocently talking to a pretty coworker, she may begin yelling at him about how rude he is being, when in reality she is simply insecure and is taking her issues out on him. If she was secure, she would be able to rationalise that her boyfriend is simply being cordial to his coworker.

I happen to know a woman who projected her feelings all the time and did not realise that her projections were ruining her life. She got mad when her partner had so many friends because she did not have any friends, so she took her anger out on her partner. She got defensive when her partner talked about just about anything, because she had no confidence. She finally began to realise that the issues shecomplained about her partner were really her own issues. When she gained insight into how she tended to project, she started looking inside to contend with her own shadow.

I once heard of projection explained in terms of energy. Envision that your chest is full of different electrical outlets and each outlet is a different characteristic about you. The nice qualities that you like are all covered with cover plates so there is no chance of electricity running through them. On the other hand, the qualities about yourself that you do not like do not have cover plates. They are well able to have electricity run through them! So what happens when someone displays that characteristic in front of us, they plug into our uncovered outlet and let the energy flow!

For example, if you harbour unresolved anger, you will attract other angry people into your life via the law of attraction. You might run into an angry coworker and then go home and tell everyone how awful that person is, but you suppress your own anger. You might not even realise that you are harbouring such anger. You might say to your partner, "You are so angry all the time! I can't take it! Why can't you just be happy?" In reality though, you might be the one harbouring all that anger and feeling miserable.

We all have a shadow lurking deep down inside us. It is that shadow that keeps us from owning up to our own mess. But sooner or later we are given the opportunity to face our shadow and let all the junk that we have carried unconsciously for so many years go. Oftentimes it is during a season of hardship or reflection that we begin to see negative emotions rise to the surface. We think, "Wow, am I really that angry? Selfish? Bitter? Prideful? Mean?" 

One thing I appreciate about relationships of any kind is that they oftentimes mirror each person's inner world. When I look at you, I see me. When you look at me, you see you. This is one reason so many couple's fight. They point fingers strongly at one another pointing out character defects, but so many times they are really pointing out things in themselves that are driving them crazy! They mirror each other.

It's time to pull your plugs out of other people's outlets and plug them into your own outlets. Take some time to really think about what you complain about. Do you constantly judge others? If so, it's time to judge yourself. Do you complain about your partner's selfishness, laziness, thoughtlessness, or personality? If so, take some time to evaluate those negative qualities in yourself. Face your shadow and own up to your stuff. As you do, you will be more apt to be happier and more loving. You will be stressed less and more accepting of others. If someone accuses you of something, instead of flipping out, you will be able to calmly and politely address the situation and let it go. 

You will feel free and freedom certainly feels amazing!

Author:Tony Fahkry

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